Top Ten Reasons Why I'm Not Posting Very Often

10. Kid stuff. Beyond the homework and Scouts and friends and whatnot, there's been a lot of extra-curriculars lately. First, there's the boys' baseball, and even though it's been fun and a great learning experience for both of them, man it's time consuming. Forrest's been serving as Ethan's assistant coach, too, so he's gone a lot as well. But I do have some cute baseball photos! And just as long as I'm not killing myself with nerves and dread (it's a sports related mental illness that goes back to my childhood, don't ask) the games can be pretty fun.




(note how in this photo his eyes are closed and the ball is coming in under the bat :-)

Elise also had her final performances for the Children's Theater group she's been a part of this year. They did a play called "The Little Mermaid Meets the Pirates of the Caribbean" and it was a full two hour song and dance and costume filled extravaganza. Elise played a mermaid and did a great job. Here are some cute shots of her performance:





Oh, and you may have noticed Elise got bangs. We both think they're very cute and it's been a very positive development, other than the mean boy in her class who told her she looked like she had a mullet. I told her he was full of it and had no idea what a mullet was anyway, and if she wanted proof I could show her my Hunter Junior High School yearbook photos.

9. Computerholicism. I am spending waaaaay too much time in my office lately. Between the end of the semester (reading and commenting on 60 or so 4-5 page Classical Argument Essays are enough to make anyone, I mean anyone, want to stay away from a computer keyboard unless absolutely necessary) and the very pleasant but also computer related reading of both my bro the T-Bone's highly anticipated Deseret Book offering (Ever Wonder Why? will be coming to a Deseret Book near you sooooon. The DB suits will probably insist on using his given name, "Anthony," instead of T-Bone on the cover, although it would be cool and attract lots of teen buyers. Maybe he'll have to run that by Sheri Dew?) and my awesome friend and writing homey Kathy's book, due to hit the stores next Spring . . . well, let's just say I've been using the "insert comment" function in my MS Word program a heckofa lot in the last week or so.

8. Parentheses. No matter the time of year--winter, spring, summer, fall--a good deal of my mental energy is expended trying to figure out new and amusing ways to insert parenthetical comments into any of my written communication (you know you love 'em, right?).

7. That blasted coccyx! For the first time in my life, my tail bone hurts. It's probably due to all the sitting at the computer--my computer chair has absolutely no padding left--or maybe I'm just an ol' lady. Could be that. But I've taken to heating up our corn bag (if any of you don't already own a corn bag, please visit the link provided. I mean it. Corn bags beat heating pads hands down). Anyway, I've taken to stuffing our corn bag in the back of my jeans for a little relief. It's both healing and very attractive.

6. My Personal Development and Entertainment. I've been a busy lady lately. After all those years of Forrest going golfing and hunting and fishing and snowboarding and him telling me, "You need to get out and find something you want to do!", well, I think I'm taking him up on it. After not going to Provo ONCE since moving to Utah, after tomorrow I will have been to Provo EIGHT TIMES since February. EIGHT. An AML conference, a publishers' fair, a poetry reading, a job interview (yes, I interviewed to teach creative writing at BYU, but the committee that makes the decisions hasn't met yet. Will keep you posted), a play (at least Forrest went with me to that one), a baby shower, Women's Conference book signing (will discuss in more detail next) and tomorrow I'm going with Kathy and Darlene to the book signing of one of our other writers group members (Ms. Sharlee Glen's book Just What Mama Needs has just been released to wild acclaim.) So there's that.

5. Bound on Earth stuff. It's slowing down a bit, but I've had some book club requests and the aforementioned Women's Conference signing. That was a really fun experience. They invited a passel of writers and I was honored to be able to come. Lucikly, I got to sit by a very intelligent and interesting woman, a psychologist who wrote a book called Forgiving Ourselves for Deseret Book, and we kept each other entertained and staved off feelings of dorkiness during lulls in the action. But it was exciting to see my name in the brochures and hanging on a sign from the ceiling--just like Chieko Okazaki's! Now, she probably sold a few hundred books and me a few dozen if I was lucky . . . but still! And after the signing I got to hang with my Mamacita and her friends. We quilted and had an undersauced Polynesian dinner and went to a concert jam packed with all the Mormon Light Rock Faves (your Hillary Weekses, your Kenneth Copes, and even, yes, your Michael McCleans). To be honest, I was skeptical about the concert because I'd had some rough McClean experiences in the past (I'm not a grab the hand of the person sitting next to you, raise it in the air and sway kind of girl)--but I'll be darned if the concert wasn't really good. Fun, energetic, and some of the performers were just fabulous. A great day.



(a big thanks to my Mom's friend Debbie for the pics. Even though the dreaded Sweat family sloping esophagus is on full display in the profile shot. Gotta avoid the profile shots!)


4. Housewifery. Cleaning. Laundry. Dishes. Dinner. Killing the ants that have invaded the kitchen. Etc.

4. Playing Man on Man Defense with Wyatt. I have to lock all the doors and now whenever poor Forrest goes anywhere, he ends up locked out. Gotta get that man a house key. Especially when he comes home from somewhere and I'm drying my hair or in the basement playing Guitar Hero. (That only happened once. The one and ONLY time I've played Guitar Hero in the last month or so. I've gotten rusty.)

3. Boob Tubiness. I've gotten back in the TV habit now that the writer's strike is over. I really don't feel guilty about this--really I don't, and I'm NOT protesting too much--but these are the shows I TiVo and must watch each week:

-Medium (Forrest won't watch this one with me anymore. He ALWAYS bails on dramas after the first two years. Says he can't watch Patricia Arquette sit straight up in bed with that startled look on her face anymore. I see where he's coming from . . . but I still like the show, if only because Patricia Arquette is one of the ONLY WOMEN on television that is normal sized. Not skinny, not fat--because in TV land those are the only options--just a good Mom-size, probably a 12, a 10 if she's been counting her Weight Watchers points. Go Patricia!)

--American Idol, both days, although I zip through most of the results show on the TiVo. My heart's still with little Davey Archuletta, although I realize that he's a bit of a one trick pony, and the "gorsh!"ing and "aw shucks!"ing and shuffling around with his shoulders up around his ears in humility gets a little tough to take. But what about David Cook's smarmy little glances to the camera, like he's too cool for this and knows it? He's had some amazing performances, but something about him just gets under my skin. There's no way Syesha will win.

--Top Chef. Although it's not one of my favorite shows, it TiVos late on Wed night and then I can watch it Thurs morning when I'm doing the dishes or folding laundry.

--(Okay, I am ashamed of this one) America's Next Top Model. I know!!! I know. Kinda pathetic. And I don't watch it every week. Does that help? And at least I don't watch Dancing With The Stars . . .

--Lost. Of course. It's been a delicious season so far, although Jack (I'm sorry ladies) just bugs me. Bugs me! When it gets right down to it, I'm a Sayeed girl. There, I said it. Iraqi Republican Guard torturers are easier for me to identify with than mopey, drunken, bossy spinal surgeons. Oh, and do you think Claire is dead? I'm thinking yes. She had that wry little smile in the cabin and wasn't at all nervous about Aaron. And how bad is Ben, really?

--The Office. I can't believe Jim's on corrective action. And Ryan's pseudo hipster dude beard is one of my favorite new developments of the past few years.

--30 Rock. Some episodes are absolutely hilarious, others still a little wobbly. The season finale was great, though. And Forrest loves him some Tina Fey so much that I have to watch with him, just to keep an eye out. (And yes, we went to Baby Mama opening weekend. You've gotta support your peeps!)

So, yeah, that's a lot of TV. So sue me.

3. Magnifing my Calling. Or at least trying to remember to still do it the way I'm supposed to. After Christmas and the Birthday social, I think the Enrichmenty party of my brain wants to go on autopilot. And they told us at Stake leadership training that Super Saturday doesn't count as a Quarterly Activity! Travesty! But we will soldier on.

2. Wifeliness. Forrest has been on a travel "brown out" for the last few months. Kinda funny since six months ago he was supposed to travel 3 days a week whether he needed to or not (gotta show us that hustle!) and now he's not supposed to travel at all as a cost saving measure. It's been really nice to have him around, but part of me feels a little guilty, like I've been taking advantage of him. (Did I tell you I've been to Provo eight times??). So I'm trying to use whatever energy I have left to be extra nice and tell him what a hottie he is in his cute little running outfit and not stay up all night ignoring him while I type on the computer. Tonight he's at Scout camp with Ethan, which is why this post is so dang long. Love ya, hon.

1. Blog Exhaustion. When I first got my blog, I was excited about it and would think about it a lot--little witty things I could say, interesting topics to wax philosophical over, photos I could upload. It was kind of like a new high school boyfriend with whom I'd become infatuated. But the romance period is over and sometimes the blog feels a little like a chore. And I have so many dang chores. So I might not always post once a week . . . but when I do, watch out! I'll probably unload, just like I've done here.

Thanks for hanging with me . . .

Update on the Mister

(Those eyes! Those lips! I mean, c'mon.)

Mr. Wyatt Dean (known affectionately as Mr. Baby, Mr. Dean, or good ol' Mister)hasn't had a lot of good blog time lately, so I thought I'd take a minute and share a bit about my favorite 15 month old.

-He was sick last night. Poor Bubba. He's never had a true stomach virus before, and it's always so shocking to babies when the throw up, don't you think? After two changes of sheets his tummy finally settled down, and today he's on a strict juice and pretzels regimen (it's all he'll eat). But no throw up since this morning, so we're in good shape.

**editorial update** while typing this, we had a spectacular diaper. So there's that.

-He loves anything with a long handle: toothbrushes, combs, toilet plungers, toilet brushes, brooms (he's holding one right this very minute), baseball bats, and my Swiffer wet jet.

-He's becoming quite a talker. Some of his favorite words are: ball, na na (banana), ni ni (night night), Hiiieeeey! (he says this very enthusiastically any time Forrest comes into the room), uh oh, ow, whassat? or dis? (he says this a lot in the mornings, pointing at everything he can find), ow-sigh (outside, which is the place he prefers to be, always), and he an tell you what a doggie, kitty, snake, and lion can say. He can also show you your nose and your hair, but you might up with a fistful of your hair yanked out of your scalp for the trouble. His newest means of communication that I just noticed is whenever anything is in the microwave, he starts blowing. I figured out it means he wants a hot dog or chicken nuggets (since that's what we do to them after we take them out of the microwave, smart kid).

-He loves to read. He'll bring you book after book and sit as content as can be in your lap, listening to you read. He loves books about animals and books where he can lift any kind of flap.



-He's started watching Teletubbies. I know it's bad to let him watch TV, but we have Teletubbies "on demand" on Comcast (oh, the luxuries I didn't have with the other three!) and every once in a while, we'll let him watch one. He's not much into Sesame Street or anything animated yet. But he likes him some Dipsy and LaLaa and NuNu action.

-He's an adventurous type. We have to lock all the doors in the house or else he'll promptly escape out one of them. He'll go straight up to big dogs and try to pet them, and he recently ended up in the bottom of our rock window well (but standing on his own two feet! He had a little scratch on his knee but was otherwise unharmed. Don't know how he pulled it off.)

-He has this hilarious Wyatt language. He'll engage you in entire conversations full of it. It sounds like a mixture of German and Chinese. Here's a great video clip of Wyatt pretending to be his dad on a conference call:



He's a pretty cool little human.

FOUR posts today . . .

which is crazy, I know. But we've had so much going on at our house over the last week or so. So much GOOD stuff. So make sure you start at the top and keep on readin'.

Lillian Marie Colasurdo!

I am so happy to announce the birth of the first of FOUR nieces we'll be welcoming to our family this year.

Lillian Marie Colasurdo (aka Lilly) was born yesterday, April 21st. She weighed in at 7 lbs. 14 oz. And she's absolutely beautiful, as you can see. Mindy and Peter had a little bit of a scare getting her here, as she was breech and an emergency c-section ended up being necessary. But she is healthy and recovering nicely after a bit of a stressful birth.

It was so fun to go to the hospital today and see her. Oh, how I love going to the hospital and seeing new babies--one of my favorite things in the wide world. We're happy you're here, little girl! And good job, Mindy. We love you.

Barnes & Noble Book Signing

After the marathon on Saturday, we headed home, showered, primped (well, at least I did :-) and took off for my reading and signing at Barnes & Noble.

I have to say that I was pretty nervous about the whole thing. Would anyone come? What story would I read? What would I do, sitting at that little table at the front of the store with my books and my pens and my signs and my specially made souvenir bookmarks? In all of the "marketing your book" how-tos, they say you're supposed to be chatty and bold, walking directly up to people and saying, "Hi! My name is Angela! I've written a novel about (blah blah blah). Would you like to learn more about it?"

Problem number one: I still don't have a coherent answer to the "what is your book about" question, so unless the poor, trapped victim wanted to listen to my two paragraph explanation, the "bold and chatty" approach wasn't going to work.

Problem number two: It's not really my style, walking directly up to people and telling them they want something. Anything. Even salvation, I guess, which is why it's probably a good thing I was never a missionary :-).

Luckily, I was saved by my wonderful family and friends, who came out to support me. I was really touched by the number of people I care about who were there to listen to me read and come to my little table and let me sign their books.

Not only did my two mucho-pregenante sisters-in-law (yes, I made up that adjective, but it's a fun word to say) haul themselves and all their kids across town,



but a bunch of good neighbors came, and I was so pleasantly surprised to see some old friends from high school. Even a half dozen women from my mom's work came--which was so kind of them, and is a testament to how much everyone who knows my mom loves her.



I'm so glad I thought to get a picture of Darlene and Kathy, two of my great writer friends. Darlene is an award-winning poet and fiction writer and fabulous champion of all things Mormon and literary; Kathy is the mother of the lit-mag and blog Segullah (as well as seven flesh and blood children), the editor of the anthology Gifts: How Children With Down Syndrome Have Enriched Our Lives, and the soon-to-be published author of her own memoir coming out with a national press. (She got an actual ADVANCE! I was so happy for her I cried.) And both of them live five minutes away from me. I can't believe how blessed I am to have such great examples and friends who happen to be amazing writers living down the street.

And Darlene stayed with me the WHOLE ENTIRE TIME, so if no one was at my table she could come up and talk to me, preventing me from feeling like a dork. That's true friendship, right there.

It was really a wonderful day. And I was so glad my kids could be there and share it, too. (And this isn't the best picture of all of us, but it's the only one I've got!)



And, once again, no Wyatt! I know, I know--he was with a babysitter, since readings at quiet bookstores aren't really his thing. Lest you think we've sold him to a band of traveling gypsies, though, here's a picture, so you won't forget his cuteness:

Marathon Man (Okay, Half Marathon Man)

On Saturday morning, my stud of a husband ran a half marathon. He's been training for it since February (and lost about 20 pounds in the process--now when I lay my head on his chest at night it feels like I'm snuggling with a rock. Does it mean I'm one of those spouses who tries to undermine weight loss when I say I liked it better when it was soft and cozy? But he's looking really good in his jeans, that much is true.)

He ran the half marathon in just under two hours, at 1:56, which meant he maintained a pace of about 8 minutes and 50 seconds per mile. That's pretty great for a guy who's new to running. He came in 948th out of 3814 runners. It was really fun to go there with the kids and cheer him on as he crossed the finish line.



Forrest ran the marathon with Mindy's husband, Peter. I'm sure if Mindy wasn't days away from giving birth, she would have given it a shot herself! I'm just so proud of them for doing something that I don't think I'll ever be able to do.



But I can be a supportive wife :-). Good job, babe.

Sunburns and Safaris

Trip Update Part 2

The Hotel:
The hotel in San Diego was near the Cinderella Castle/Sand Diego temple, and we got to stay on the hotel's tippy top floor. We could see the temple out our window. When we arrived, there were a plethora of young people scattered all over the lobby; the crazy thing was, some looked super conservative, dressed in sensible skirts and blazers and carrying briefcases, and the others looked super skanky. I mean, spangled chartruese mini-dresses that left very little to the imagination. Turns out there was a Model United Nations AND a "fraternity prom" going on at the exact same time. So some members of the future of our nation were getting a little more than tipsy and wobbling around in stilletos, while others where busy pouring over graphs of agriculture subsidies in Argentina. Very interesting to observe.

The room was really nice--we always get a suite, not because we're hotel snobs (but who knows, maybe we are) but mainly so we don't have to watch Disney Channel with the kids. Jonas found himself the perfect place to crash and loved his little makeshift bed:



Beach-a-rama:

There's a great beach in San Diego that apparently every single other tourist and San Diego resident decided to descend upon. It was the first really warm weekend in CA, so lots of bikini-clad folk were out and about. I looked around, and besides one sixty-year old woman, I was the only one there wearing a skirted swimsuit. Whatever. They're comfortable. Anyway, here's a shot of the boys lounging in the surf:



The San Diego Wild Animal Park:



On the last day of our trip, we went to the Wild Animal Park. It started out as a breeding facility for the San Diego Zoo, but it's turned into a really cool tourist destination itself. We loved the "Journey to Africa" safari where we rode on a little tram and got to see some wildlife up close:




We also fed some cute little parrots who found perfect perches on the tops of our heads.

We had a great time. Although we missed our Wy-man, it was fun to get some time with the big kids and to see so many great sights. We were so happy to see Wyatt when we got home--we hear he was a good boy, and we're so glad and grateful to everyone who took care of him.

It was a great trip!

Coasters & The Coast

Trip Update Part 1

Although I'm still dealing with the laundry backlog from our California trip, instead of folding and putting away, I'm posting and bringing this baby up-to-date. And this isn't going to be an exhaustive travelogue. I'll just post some pics and give you a little commentary.

Oh, and just in case you're wondering where our darling Wy-man is in all these pictures, we decided that as much as we love him, we would love him even MORE if we didn't have to wrestle with him at amusement parks and zoos for four days straight :-). So wonderful Mindy and Pete and Tony and Cindy and Grandma and Grandpa Sweat took him while we were gone, for which we remain EXTREMELY grateful. And Wyatt had a ball with all of them, too.

The Arrival:



This is a picture of the kids patiently waiting at the Hertz Rent-a-Car station in San Diego. We were happy to be there, considering Delta had overbooked our flight and we didn't have actual seats assigned (we made it onto the tiny commuter jet by the skin of our collective teeth). And upon arriving at the airport, Forrest mistakenly thought he'd booked the car through Avis so we took the shuttle there only to find that--oops!--we were booked on Hertz. Luckily we only had to trudge through a couple of parking lots until we made it to the right spot and claimed our spunky Saturn Vu.

Knott's Berry!



Here's a picture of the boys on day one, waiting in line at Knott's Berry Farm. By the way--emphasis on "Berry" or "Farm"? It was a debate. I prefer the emphasis on "Farm," Forrest and the kids on "Berry." Those dang kids always side with their father.

We drove an hour and a half to get there, but decided it was worth it because it was 1. relatively cheap and 2. would allow the kids to get some rides out of their system, since we weren't visiting Disneyland.

Let me tell you, we got the rides out of our system. The very first ride we went on was called the Silver Bullet. In order to fully explain the coater, I consulted Wikipedia, where I learned it is the longest "inverted rollercoaster" on the West Coat, and that it "features 6 inversions including a vertical loop, cobra roll, zero-g roll, and two wingovers just before the final helix."

Exactly.

Although I am ridiculously afraid of non-enclosed heights (e.g. balconies, mountaintops, etc.), I'm not really afraid of heights where I'm securely strapped in. Forrest, though, really hates twisty, turny rides (poor tummy!), so I was the one that went on this baby with Ethan and Elise. Must say, it was the craziest rollercoaster I've ever been on--made all the crazier because I kept having visions of my two skinny kids slipping out of the ride's restraints. But we made it. We lived. And Ethan and Elise even went back for more.

We spent the rest of the day riding three or four more upside-down rides--some of them with Dad and Jonas, the bravest 7 year old I know--as well as a few other less death-defying coasters, and ended the day hot, sweaty, exhausted and a mite sunburned. To our surprise, it was 95 degrees that day, and remained so throughout the entire trip. I had a sun-scorched part on the top of my head to prove it.

The Ocean:



The next day, we left LA and headed back down to San Diego. On the way there, we made our first stop at the beach. It was fun to watch all the surfers, and the kids had a ball playing in the surf--and getting a little more drenched than we thought. (Did we mention it was 95 degrees?)

Drenched Joe:



Sea World:





We headed to Sea World on Saturday. A super hot, super crowded Saturday where members of the military and their families (whom we respect and appreciate wholeheartedly) were offered free admission. So we literally got the chance to "rub shoulders," so to speak :-).

I have a way cooler picture of Shamu, but it was taken with my camera phone and I still haven't figured out how to get a photo from my phone to my computer (yeah, I know, very tech-lame of me.) We spent Saturday seeing all sorts of cool sea life . . . but decided to come back the next day in order to ride some of the rides. There were lines over an hour long for the "Journey to Atlantis," and unless they were taking us to the ACTUAL Atlantis, not gonna do it. Luckily we had these 3 day passes and the next day the kids journeyed to Atlantis four times, back to back. (Ethan thought they should rename the ride the "Journey to Self Esteem," since the whole entire time this lady intoned phrases like, "Thank you for your heroism. Because of you, Atlantis has been saved! Without you, all would be lost! Your bravery is overwhelming!" We were all stumped as to how strapping ourselves into a tube and floating along a water-propelled roller coaster is capable of changing anything, in Atlantis or elsewhere--but we appreciated the kind words.)

We got to see Shamu up VERY close, pet and feed a dolphin, hand feed a bat-ray (gross) and enjoy the beautifully manicured Sea World grounds--made that much more beautifully manicured in comparison to Knott's Berry's (although we DID see an actual impromptu cock fight between two loose roosters on the Knott's Berry grounds--quite a sight).

And there will be more to come . . . in my next post.

More Bound on Earth stuff

One more quick update: I have a reading/signing tomorrow (Sat.) at the Barnes & Noble in Sandy from 1:00-4:00. If you can make it, I'd love to see you! But if you can't, I totally understand.

Also, there was an article in the Salt Lake Tribune today, as well as a review of the book published in a weekly Salt Lake Magazine called In Utah This Week. You can click on the links and check them out.

And I WILL post the promised vacation update . . . soooooon . . .

This blog is a little behind . . .

as you all might have noticed. Part of my excuse is that we've been on vacation to lovely San Diego, California (great fun had by all!), and the other part of my excuse is that I've been, of course, busy. But I will update soon. I have lots to say about the California trip and baseball and all sorts of fun stuff.

And a little personal update: long story, but as a lot of you know I've been involved with the lit mag Irreantum off an on for a few years. One of their co-editors in chief decided to step down and they've been trying to fill the slot. They asked me to do it and I decided to say yes. I know I'm usually super busy, but here is why I said yes:

1. I love Irreantum. It's always been, and remains, very important to me, and I want it to keep on going strong.

2. I decided to stop teaching at SLCC, so I'll have a little more time.

3. As co-editor, I am going to be responsible for one issue a year. The other co-editor, Scott, is going to be in charge of the other one. I figure that if I stay organized, I can handle one issue a year. Especially since the magazine brought on a managing editor, Kathleen, who's exceptionally organized and will take care of all the administrative stuff.

4. It felt right.

So there you have it! And very very soon, I will upload all my great California photos and regale you with our tales of sea dwelling mammals and sunburned scalps :-).

p.s. If you want to bop over to Segullah, today I wrote my monthly post. It's on getting published. Check it out if you're interested.

The Promised Photos

This is a photo catch-up post. Here are some great shots from an Easter egg hunt at Grandma and Grandpa's house:








I'm not posting any pics from Easter morning because they're all terrible. My pictures of Easter morning are ALWAYS terrible--everyone looks rumply and sleepy. Even the kids in the Easter clothes pics are wrong on lots of levels. Well, what the hey, here's one so I can show you:



See what I mean?

We also celebrated Jonas's big 7th B-Day this weekend. Here are some pictures from the party at Gasoline Alley, our local arcade, to prove it:





Seven year old boys are still so dang cute. Even if they can go through a ziplock stuffed with tokens in 15 minutes flat.

And lastly, here's a shot of my almost-not-a-kid-anymore kid who graduated into responsible adolescence this week when he got contact lenses. When I took him in for the "contact practice session," the eye doctor said he was "the fastest 12 year old to catch on to the process I've ever worked with!" to which Ethan replied, "Eleven year old!" He really does look good, though, with his baby blues out from behind those lenses. Here he is in all his blue-eyed goodness:




And now you're all caught up!

Easter and things

I have not yet posted about Easter, mainly because the camera with all the good pictures on it is still at my Mom's, and who wants to read about Easter egg hunting without pictures? Not me. But apparently I'm going to make you do it anyway.

Easter was fun, kind of low-key. I ended up making parts of four different dinners and taking them all over town. A friend of mine isn't feeling well, so I took some food to her family. Then Forrest's Mom just had knee surgery, so we made some more food to take to them. Then we were going to have dinner with Mindy & Pete, but the Colasurdo clan wound up hunkering indoors, under flu lockdown, so we swappend food with them, too. (And Mindy, I must say the little homemade shortcakes you created for our strawberry shortcake ROCKED! Too bad we couldn't see you in person to praise you!). We ended up eating a hodgepodge dinner, just us an the kids, but it was kind of nice.

Oh, but the day BEFORE Easter, I got to go to the Whitney's, a fancy shindig where the awards for the best LDS writing of 2007 were handed out. I blogged about it on Segullah today. You can read it here if you'd like. (Oh, and if any of you, my loved ones, would like to nominate my book for next year, you can do it at the Whitney site. Not that I'm asking or anything. :-)

And that's all I have time to write right now. I'll update more when I have what you really want to see--the pictures.

I just ate three Samoas

and washed them down with Diet Coke, and I feel a little sick to my stomach.





Why do I do these things?

So first things first, Wyatt Dean does NOT have eczema. Nosiree. His rash is the rash that will not subside, so I brought him back to see the actual pediatrician who took one look at him and said, "Hmmmm . . . . Dunno what that is."

Which is always very encouraging to hear. He told me to find a dermatologist, so after much calling ("Booked until June" was a common response), I finally squeezed him in this morning. And I'm glad, because yesterday the rash traveled all over his back and up his neck and onto his ears (bless his little neck and ears, as my mom is wont to say) and my nerves just couldn't take it. I think there is something lodged in our reptilian brain that makes us simply recoil at the sight of rashes.

Beep, beep, beep, alert, alert, all hands on deck, something is afoot! Like that.

I am so pleased to say, though, that the dermatologist is "99.9% sure" (his words) that Wyatt has a "post viral exanthem"--fancy doctor talk for "he had a virus, then he got a rash." I was skeptical about this at first, since the rash has lasted almost two weeks, but the Dr. is (as he said) 99.9% sure. He said it should go away on its own soon, and hopefully it will.

So that was a relief.

Also had Elise's Big 10th Birthday Bash today.



Contemplating the meaning of 10 candles.



Cute girls gabbing.

It was a houseful of girls. Twelve of them. It was a "Rock Star" party, and I did the whole decorating thing with balloons and shiny curlicues hanging from the ceiling and confetti. We spray painted the girls' hair and they all got lip gloss and body glitter. (Hope no parents were mad. C'mon parents! Don't be mad!) Then the girls did Sing Star and danced around and I'm going to eventually make a little "music video" with my video editing software that we'll give to them when we hand out thank yous. Should be cute. And Elise had a great time. And I'm glad it's over. :-)

Now onward and upward to Easter! And Forrest's Birthday! And Jonas's! Ahh, March.

Exzumuh

This is what Wyatt has. Exzumuh (phonetic spelling of eczema.) Or, if you are like my nurse practitioner, Exzeema. Like Noxema, only it leaves you with the opposite of smooth, creamy skin. You end up rashy, bumpy, itchy, altogether miserable. Poor baby. Here's a pic:



And then here's another pic of him looking hilarious with his hair sticking straight up after a bath:




And another pic of him looking handsome once I smoothed his hair back down:





Wyatt's bout with eczema has me a little distressed--I feel so bad for him that he's so itchy and splotchy. And there's not much we can do about it, other than to give him topical steroids (fortunately he's not pitching for Major League Baseball) and slather him in expensive lotions and hope for the best. After two days of steroiding and slathering, we haven't seen much of an improvement. And I've done my googling best, but folks are decidedly torn over whether his form of dermatitis is due to a food related allergic reaction or not. It's so hard to tell. The ped told me that it doesn't have anything to do w/ milk, but I wonder.

Also, this week I had my RS Birthday Social to pull off on Tues. Went swimmingly. "A Celebration of the Arts" was the theme, and women in the ward performed and displayed their multitude of impressive talents. We decorated in all black and white with cool swirly tree branches spray painted black and put in loverly tall vases (the tree branches were hacked from a gaggle of trees running along the side of 3200 West, near an Elk/Buffalo farm. We are still really in the country out here.) Over 60 ladies attended, and we had to frantically set five more place settings in order to accommodate everyone. A good time was had, however, and now it is done. This is my 3rd RS Birthday party, and I'm starting to think that once you do something three times in a calling (three sacrament meeting programs, three Youth Conferences, three Visiting Teaching Seminars, etc etc etc) you start to think, "Hmmmm . . . running out of ideas, here!" Itchiness (metaphorical itchiness, not eczema-like itchiness) begins to set in. Perhaps we could call it the "Church Calling Rule of Three." At any rate, if I'm still in this calling next year, I might need to ask the bishop if we can call a "Relief Society Birthday Party Idea Specialist". It's a big ward. It could be done.

Also had kids' parent teacher conferences. All three are doing great--improving and behaving themselves. I have very little to complain about right now as a mom, which is nice. Elise is even holding her own with long division, and I'm so proud of her. And Ethan is holding his own at baseball practice, and I'm so proud of him. And Jonas is pretty much busy being charming and (mostly) good--the only thing his teacher had to suggest was that he speak up more in class discussions. (Somehow, Ethan's teachers never mention this. :-) I said to Jonas, "Hey, bud, remember, when the teacher asks a question, you can raise your hand and answer, too." And he said, "Yeah, Mom, but sometimes I worry that I talk a little too much. And I don't want to take up anyone else's time, you know?"

My six year old feels like I do during a lull in the Relief Society lesson. Ha!

And now, tonight, Forrest (the lean, mean, running machine who has lost about 10 pounds and has been training for his half marathon with singleminded zeal) has taken Ethan to his first official Scout Camp. Even though Ethan's 11, they decided to let him come if his dad came too. So now the both of them are spending the night at the Sand Dunes in Central Utah, crammed into a tent with a bunch of stinky pre-and-post pubescent males. Ah, the rituals of manliness. Hope they have fun.

Now I have to go and bathe the baby, lather him up, and say a little prayer that his rash looks better in the morning.

GLARING EDITORIAL OMISSION: I am adding this to the end of this post just in case you've already perused it. I forgot to blog about the AML Conference. Well, I didn't forget: I was just too busy madly rushing to baseball practices/piano lessons/children's theater rehearsals, throwing a giant party for sixty ladies, attending parent teacher conference and dealing with a rashy baby. Now almost a week has passed and I think I *thought* I blogged about it but didn't. Anyway, it was great fun. Spent all day Saturday there. And Forrest managed not only to hold down the proverbial fort, but to clean out the fridge AND the master bedroom closet while I was away. (Digression: While living in MN, I went on a Girl's Trip to Vegas and Forrest built a picnic table while I was gone. He continues to show me up in almost every way, but luckily he still loves me. And at least I regularly best him at Boggle. There's something.) I met some great people, had some great conversations, sold some books and went to Eugene England's incredible and supremely professorial house for a reading. Good times.

I Looked Up My Book in the Library

So I went onto the Salt Lake City and County library sites and looked up my very own book, and it was there. And checked out and on hold in the SL City system (still in cataloging in SL County).

I have a library book!!

If you haven't seen some of the good reviews lately, I have links to them on my website. You should check out the one on a blog called C Jane Enjoy It!--her review two days ago helped my Amazon number sink below 5,000. She's one influential chicky, and her blog is hilarious. (So hilarious that she's able to sell advertising and basically use her blog as a part time job.)

Ethan has baseball tryouts today. Jonas had them on Monday and things seemed to go well. We've had a stray cat decide that she lives in our backyard (much to Buttercup's chagrin) and the kids have named her Snowball and are devastated that we won't keep her. I start to get persuaded, but then Buttercup wakes us up three time a night to go in and out and in and out, and throws up on the carpet, and claws the living room furniture, and I remember that I'd have to be a crazy woman to add one more cat to the mix. No matter how often those kids look at me with their wide, sad eyes . . . We're taking Snowball to a shelter today to see if she has an electronic tracking chip. She's not much more than a kitten, so I'm sure she'll be adopted if she doesn't. Ethan, if you're reading this: We're SURE she'll be adopted. Don't be sad.

Wyatt continues his rampage. Yesterday we took him to Home Depot and he had this maniacal glint in his eye and went straight to a display full of Draino and started unloading it. He LOVED the Home Depot. Also tried to rip off all the "sale" tags attached to the washers and dryers--just his height. He's become obsessed with books and won't stop bringing them to us, over and over and over. "Where is Baby's Mommy?" is a favorite. ("Where is Baby's Mommy?" "On the computer, honey, in the office. Now don't play in the toilet until she's all done.")

Now I have to go to BYU and drop off a shipment of my books. They've ordered 12 (and I'm bringing them, long story) and the nice lady said she'd put them on an end cap. Cool deal!

BYU Galore

On Friday, I went with my fabulous friend Darlene to go see the former poet laureate Billy Collins read at BYU. It was wonderfully fun, and I'm happy to say Darlene has written the perfect blog post describing it all. You can read it here if you'd like (and you should, if only to get the chance to bop over to Darlene's great blog).

Thanks Darlene, for the great day and the great post!

Favorite Reality Stars of All Time

So as I sat in my living room and got misty-eyed listening to the darling David Archuletta of Murray, Utah, singing the third verse of the Beatles "Imagine" (the verse that doesn't dis on religion), it caused me to think about my favorite reality stars of all time. The ones I loved because they were so cute or smart or funny or all around charming--or even the ones that weren't any of those things, but for some reason I loved them anyway. In no particular order, here they are:

Colby from Survivor:



Setting aside the obvious hunky factor, Colby not only loved his Mama, but he was so chivalrous that after winning the final challenge, he chose to take friendly Tina with him to the finale instead of a really annoying guy (I forget his name) whom he most certainly would have beaten. Instead, Tina ended up taking the million--and Colby ended up the nicest Survivor ever . . . and did I mention the hunky factor?

Clay Aiken of American Idol



Alright, so my enthusiasm for Clay has waned over the years, especially after his weird appearance with Kelly Ripa where he put his hand over her mouth
. (I was watching that day and the whole scene was awkward from the beginning.) He seems to have gotten a little surly as the fame has taken hold. But during that season of AI, I was rooting for the goofy kid with the big ears and the FM 100 voice from the very beginning--and HE ended up being a runner up too, just like Colby, graciously losing to Rueben Studdard even though he ended up more famous in the long run.

Julie from The Real World



Julie was one of the very first famous Mormon reality stars, and back in the day (I think it was 2000?) I would still watch The Real World every once in a while. It was fascinating to see a sheltered Mormon girl on the show and to watch her honestly try to understand and relate to the other people she lived with, while simultaneously trying to please her mom and dad back in Provo. The episode when her dad came to see her and she tried to explain some of her conflicts--and his sincere attempt to try and listen to her and understand--was really excellent TV. I don't know much about what has happened to her since, other than she was kicked out of BYU for living in a coed situation and ended up on some other MTV reality shows which I didn't watch. But that season was sooo interesting.

Rob and Amber of Survivor/Amazing Race



Now I know many reality aficionados who would vehemently disagree with me, seeing Rob (especially) and Amber as manipulative and dishonest and untrustworthy . . . but man, I loved watching them! That Survivor All-Stars when they fell in love was one of my favorite Survivors ever, then seeing them compete together in The Amazing Race was one of my favorite Amazing Races ever. Rob is smarmy, yes, but you've gotta admit there's something compelling in his smarminess. Am I right??

Jay McCarrol of Project Runway



Jay ended up winning the very first season of Project Runway--and it was such great TV, that first season. And I loved Jay's sense of humor and how talented he was, and then when they went to his tiny little hometown and we met his family I was hooked. When he won I was so happy for him I actually cried a little. Jay! I think he's also gotten a little messed up by the subsequent fame, though, which is too bad. But that was a fun, fun season to watch.

Matt and Suzy of The Biggest Loser



Maybe I just like reality stars who end up marrying each other? But both Matt and Suzy were so cute and vulnerable and funny during their seasons of The Biggest Loser--and they both lost so much weight and looked so fabulous at the finale. And then they ended up marrying each other. And having a baby!

So those are some of my favorite reality stars. And you can go ahead and question me for 1. thinking deeply about such things and 2. writing about them on my blog. But we all need our distractions, no? So for those of you who dare to answer, who are YOUR favorite reality stars??