The Promised Miscellania Post

So I've been waiting for Forrest to do a guest post (yes! you heard it here first!) on his two trips to Germany and Mexico, but the guy's been a little busy. So whilst we wait, why don't I hit my mental randomizer and see what pops up.

bee-boop-bee-boop--BIIING! (that's the sound a randomizer makes, obviously):

1. The cat is sitting on my lap while I type this. She's stayed away from me for years, but lately she's been much more affectionate. I think it's because she knows I want to kill her. Why, you ask? Not only does she wake me up at 4:30 a.m. to be let out, and not only does she throw up on carpets and bedspreads and doormats and in the exact spot under the kitchen table that I can't see but can step in . . . but now she's doing this to the bottom step in my entryway:

I know, right? Stupid cat.

And yeah, I had to shoo her off my lap so I could go take a picture of her treachery.

2.  I have been hypnotized by J Lo's beauty this season of American Idol. I'm beginning to wonder if sparkles exude from her pores instead of sweat. (I wonder: what person would I be if I'd grown up answering to the name Angie Sparkles? Think on that.)

I'm kind of liking this Simon-less season of AI. Steven Tyler is wacky, but in a cool-older-uncle-who's-learned-some-hard-lessons kind of way, and the aforementioned J Lo is gorgeous and smart and breaks down in convulsions of sobs when she has to send home mildly talented fiances of wheelchair-bound car accident victims. (Follow that?) Randy is, of course, a waste. But the talent this year is head and shoulders above last year's train wreck. Yay!

3.  Super Target, I bow before you. I am happy (nay, thrilled) to announce that the brand new Super Target a mere seven minutes from my front door has finally opened. I can not adequately describe my pleasure. I can only say that I no longer have to drive 15 minutes to go to our kinda grimy, bag your own groceries, looks like a warehouse but not priced like a warehouse shlump-fest of a supermarket and instead get to go here:

In the words of Charlie Sheen: Super Target? WINNING!

Cub Foods? Built by trolls.

4. The only thing to mar my inaugural trip to Super Target happened when I wandered past the Easter candy aisle. I wasn't really looking for Chicks and Rabbits* so I could buy a bag and put it in my secret candy spot. Oh, no. Just checking to see if they were in, you know? Just for the sake of information gathering. A reconnaissance mission, you might call it. But to my everlasting horror, here is what I found:

Excuse me, but really? JELLY Chicks and Rabbits? Who is responsible for this travesty? Do we not have enough jellied items over the Easter holidays? Do these Brach's people not realize that Chicks and Rabbits in their pure, undefiled, original marshmallow-fied state are one of the best WORST foods ever created?

Don't tell me if the original Chicks and Rabbits are still available in Utah. This winter has been long enough. Don't want to hear it. La la la la la.

5. And speaking of Minnesota, can you believe I moved from Jason Chaffetz's congressional district to Official Tea Party Spokesmodel Michelle Bachman's?  Oh, the irony. We watched her on Meet the Press this Sunday and I swear, you could have asked the woman, "So, where do you live?" and she would have answered, "105 Billion Hidden Obamacare Lane." Drives. Me. Crazy.

6. And to wrap things up, a picture of one of my progeny. Another shot of Ethan standing by the fake-tree-you-stand-in-front-of-when-I-want-to-take-your-picture.  This time the picture was taken at 6:00 in the morning before he headed out the door for another speech meet. He's done a great job, taking a 2nd place in storytelling, a 1st place (!!!!), and last week, 9th place out of 40-something competitors. I talked to his coach a few days ago and she said that he's doing great, so talented (especially at such a young age) and is quite adept at making friends with girls from other schools. Sigh.

Handsome kid though, even at 6:00 a.m.

Oh, and I have to share this!

7. Mindy and Peter, sister-and-brother-in-laws-extraordinaire and parents of three beautiful daughters, just found out that they're having a boy this summer! Happy day. So fun. Now the Hallstrom side can have four boy cousins and four girl cousins, a pleasingly symmetrical outcome. Can't wait to see what a Mindy and Peter boy child looks like. I'm sure he'll be adorable.

Now hopefully I can get Forrest to do his guest post sometime in the next month or two. Encourage him in the comments if you'd like.

*I linked to the blog post from two years ago because it mentions my love of Chicks and Rabbits. I didn't read it until after this post had already been published, but now that I have it's a good reminder to me that although I feel a little adrift and even, frankly, bored lately, at least I'm not reliving that particular week of March 2009. That was a toughie.